David Bahn – Reflections

Barbara Bahn Lorhmann, my sister, died Monday morning at about 1:30. My youngest sister, Suzie, called and told us the news. Barbara had been in a battle with a return of breast cancer for the past months, having been in and out of the hospital several times. Until the very last time we talked Barbara had been a source of laughter, sincerity, love, and faith. She loved her daughters deeply. She was devoted to her mother. She had a wonderful and deep connection with our sister and nieces. She had many friends – all of whom were so kind and helpful to her.

Barbara was a vitally alive and cheerful person, a blessing to so many people. She leaves behind two daughters, Emily and Riley – both of whom now live in St. Louis. They had been with their mother over the past weeks and months through this ordeal, and were at her side when she died. Their support was vitally important to Barbara’s wellbeing. Our mother, Evelynne, was also her champion; and as she was able was at Barbara’s side. Her very special friend Bruce Hacker was a wonderful companion through this ordeal. Barbara spoke of his kindness and support with great appreciation.

Barbara was deeply sentimental, and very connected to her family. She was her daughters’ mother and friend – a combination that few people can pull off – and her mother’s great champion. She adored her two nieces and four nephews, and they loved her. There was a special connection between her and her nieces; they adored her! She made a scrapbook for Emily and had been working on a one for Riley. And on one recent phone conversation told me that she wanted to get it finished before she was unable to work on it any more, but that Suzie had promised to finish it for her if need be.

On a recent trip to our home near Houston, Texas Barbara provided her usual loving, tender-hearted contribution to our lives. When in her opinion Diane and I were a bit short with each other she told me to be kind to my “cupcake”, and then proceeded to think up a term of endearment for me. She settled on “huckleberry!” So in a recent phone conversation with her, she asked me how “Cupcake” was. That put a warm smile on my face: thanks Barb!

Barbara had been a teacher until her cancer took her from the classroom. She loved her students and was committed to their success. It was not uncommon to be in a store with her when a young man or woman would come up to her and ask her if she remembered them (she often did!). That’s not totally unusual. But occasionally she would spot a former student and tell me that she had taught him or her, and that the former student had made real strides along the way and now was doing so much better than he or she had done before. She had taught, you see, at the alternative school, and dealt with some very troubled and challenging students along the way. Even though she was literally afraid for her physical wellbeing on occasion, and it took a great toll on her, she loved her students. Many loved her as well. She and her teacher friends were deeply connected.

Jesus said, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid” (John 14:27). These are words for us at this time. And though there is a gaping hole in our hearts at her death, we do have the peace of Christ that passes all that our minds can do. And we have the promise of eternal life and the hope of the resurrection. That is a promise and hope that we cling to with special resolve and appreciation today. And well we should. For in this world we do have trouble. But Jesus has overcome the world by his death on the cross for our sins, and his resurrection from the grave for our salvation.

In the face of this loss, however, I am thankful for many things – even as we grieve:

• I am thankful that I did get to talk with her on Friday night, the night of the “Benefit for Barbara” event that her daughters organized.
• I am thankful that her daughters and Bruce were with her at the time of her death.
• I am thankful for her many friends who loved her deeply and were there for her through thick and thin.
• I am thankful that we had made arrangements to come to Cape Girardeau three days earlier than we had initially planned; although we did not get here before she died.
• I am thankful that although this downward spiral started more than 2 months ago, she did not linger for weeks in the hospital or in hospice care.
• I am thankful for the care of her physicians, nurses, techs, and others who attended to her and brought their best efforts to bear against this dread disease.
• I am thankful for the many many prayers of many many people – both in Cape as well as in Texas, and throughout the country. These lifted our spirits and enabled her to battle the disease as long as she did.
• I am thankful for the hope of the resurrection and the promise of eternal life through faith in Jesus Christ. Barbara embraced this promise and hope, and joins our dad and sister Kathryn before the throne of the Lamb in heaven – with angels, archangels, elders, and the whole host of heaven in praise to God for salvation and life!

Please do continue to keep us in your prayers – especially her daughters Emily and Riley, and our mother Evelynne.