David Bahn – Reflections

I really should have gotten the hint. Our host was yawning. The conversation had all but died. We were watching the late-night news. But I made no move to leave and go back home. My bad. They never invited us over again.

You might have said that Paul didn’t get the hint either. Only it was far more than a hint. It was an outright demand that he and his traveling companions go home – or at least get out of their town. In fact, I cannot imagine a more clear message to leave than stoning someone. Not only did they stone Paul, they dragged him out of the city, and left him for dead. “And don’t come back!” you can almost hear them say.

I’m thinking Paul was one tough dude. Not only does he get up (under his own strength?!?), but he goes right back into the city. Granted only for a while, but he goes back into the city. Ok, it was for only one night, but the next day they don’t head for home, but they continue onward in their mission trip.

It was more than sinewy muscles and hard bones that kept them going. They were compelled by the love of Christ, the clarity of his call, and the power of the Holy Spirit to take the gospel to new people and places. And this is exactly what is happening here: the gospel is reaching new people and new places. The Word of the Lord is growing (a peculiar Lukan phrase in Acts). They are seeking and seeing the Kingdom of God have ever wider impact. New people are being saved. New churches are being formed. New pastors are being appointed.

Soon they will return to Antioch, where their journey began. They will stay there for a while, but not for long. Paul and Barnabas will set out again, joined by Timothy, John Mark, Silas, and even Luke. None of them are content to stay home, for they are on the move. Through their witness, God’s reign is advancing, and the door of faith is opening to the Gentiles. That door will open wider and wider. The Good news of God’s salvation is reaching more and more people because these servants didn’t go home – even in the face of severe suffering and persecution.

Saul’s introduction to Israel is curious. When the time comes for him to be introduced as King, he is found hiding among the baggage. Is he reluctant to assume the role? Is he coy and playfully manipulating the people to seek him out? Is he truly humble and feeling unworthy to the task?

In any case his discovery and subsequent anointing as king is the beginning of a sad arc of his life and reign. He will show a flash of ruthless power when he calls the people of Israel to fight against the Philistines. But he will also show impetuous impatience when Samuel fails to show up in time for the sacrifice. Saul usurps Samuel’s authority and unlawfully takes the burnt offering and peace offering and offers it before the Lord (1 Samuel 13).

In a pivotal moment of divine judgment, Samuel confronts Saul with words that reveal both the tragedy of disobedience and the shifting of God’s favor:

And Samuel said to Saul, “You have done foolishly. You have not kept the command of the Lord your God, with which he commanded you. For then the Lord would have established your kingdom over Israel forever. ¹⁴ But now your kingdom shall not continue. The Lord has sought out a man after his own heart, and the Lord has commanded him to be prince over his people, because you have not kept what the Lord commanded you” (1 Samuel 13:13-14).

Saul’s story challenges us to examine our own hearts. Are we, like Saul, hiding from God’s call due to fear or insecurity? Or are we striving to align our lives with His will, trusting in His grace to lead us? By the Holy Spirit’s power we can seek to be people after God’s own heart, faithfully obeying His commands and reflecting the transformative love of Jesus, our true King.

When I was 11 years old, I set up our kitchen step-stool in the living room, made a seat for my sister and reenacted the Lord’s Supper with her. I’m not certain it was blasphemous, but I ask God’s forgiveness if it was. That may fall into the Psalm 19:12 category of hidden faults: Who can discern his errors? Declare me innocent from hidden faults. Perhaps I knew I would one day become a pastor.

I also recall thinking sometime later, I don’t want to be a pastor. You have to go to church every Sunday, and you have to stand up there and yell at people. Now I literally hate to miss worship. And I try earnestly not to yell at people. I believe the quiet voice of the Gospel message is the best tool of the Holy Spirit’s work.

But, oh, the pathway to arrive at that posture. It was years of poor school performance, tried and failed vocational pathways, and abandoned dreams that led me to that conversation late one night on Interstate 55. My friend Jerry said, “Dave, I think you’d be a better pastor than you would a real estate broker.” I couldn’t argue with his logic, but more important I realized that was actually God’s call on my life.

I recall the hymn that marked my seminary experience was, Hark the Voice of Jesus Calling, with it’s refrain, “Here am I, send me, send me!” The rest is history: 46 years of ministry (and still counting), challenges, joys, successes, and rich, rich blessings – one after another. Thanks be to God.

The refrain, here am I… is found in the reading today from 1 Samuel 3. Three times God comes to the boy Samuel before he realizes it is the Lord calling him, not Eli. The burden given to Samuel was heavy: announcing God’s judgment on Eli and his household, and serving as judge for Israel, and ultimately to anoint Saul to be Israel’s king – despite the warnings to the people against having a king.

This same refrain is found in Isaiah 6, when Isaiah has the vision of the Lord in his temple with the six-winged creatures flying back and forth, extolling the Lord God. Isaiah cries out, “Woe is me, I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips.” The heavenly being take an ember from the altar and cleanse the lips of Isaiah, and God calls, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” Then [Isaiah] says, “Here I am! Send me” (Isaiah 6:8).

God calls everyone to himself by the Gospel message, calling us to repentance and faith in Jesus. We are each sent as an emmasary of his grace and truth. The voice may not be as mysterious as it was to Samuel. It may not be as dramatic as it was to Isaiah. It may not be as clear as Jerry’s voice to me. But when the Holy Spirit calls us to faith, he calls us all to an adventure of faith to which we can say, “Speak, Lord, for your servant listens.”

I recall an encounter with a man who rented a room at my parents’ motel, stayed two or three nights, and went on a drunken bender. We finally learned what he was doing, and did our best to intervene and help him sober up. One part of that was to refuse to connect him to the taxi company when he would try to call through the motel switchboard to have his liquor delivered to his room.

I was in college at the time, and two things stick out in my mind about that encounter. First of all I recall the smell when we entered his room. The smell of alcohol permeated the room. Sickly sweet and pungent it hit us the moment we opened the door.

I recall, also, praying with him during this down time. He had hit bottom. We had pulled the plug on any further alcohol deliveries and I was by his bedside. As I prayed he wept. He was so very full of remorse. “I prayed to God. I prayed for help,” he sobbed. And I prayed for him as well. It was a real life and death time for him. He desperately needed God’s help.

When the binge was over he had showered, shaved and gotten dressed. He wore a suit and tie, drove his 1958 Buick past me as he left, and said, “I clean up pretty good, don’t I?” I can’t see anyone’s heart, but his comment and demeanor sure indicated to me this sorrow was not the kind that leads to life. It seems as though he had been sorry to be so miserable.

He never came back to the motel, but I’m not confident that he stayed sober.

This is the story of Israel. They have it good, become complacent, fall into apostasy, become miserable because of God’s judgment, and cry out to him for mercy and help. God delivers them from their troubles. But they repeat the cycle again and again.

Our cycle of sin, sorrow, repentance, and restoration may not be as dramatic, but we all have one to tell. When we are restored, we too easily fall back into the pit because we forget how bad it was while we were there.

Thankfully God is gracious and merciful, full of steadfast love and kindness. Thankfully we have One who did not succumb to sin, and who suffered in our place. We claim his righteousness. I think of John’s words, “My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father. He is Jesus Christ, the one who is truly righteous” (1 John 2:1). Christ steps in where we fall short. Oh how we need this Advocate! May he lead us not into temptation and deliver us from all evil!

It is a fairly safe bet to assume that I will never be an NBA basketball player. There are many reasons that I say this – many of which are obvious. It is also safe to assume that someone born in a communist block country will not assume the role of a Wall Street broker. We take this all for granted.

But we also live under the illusion that our child or grandchild can grow up to be whatever he wants to be. We see a young girl and will tell her that she can grow up to be an astronaut walk on the moon. While that may be true. It may also not be true. When and where we are born places us in contexts that either limit or open up opportunities for our live’s vocations.

As we read about the various land allotments given to the twelve tribes of Israel in Joshua 16–19, we ss how Joshua was tasked by God to distribute parcels of land to each tribe. Two and a half tribes had already received their inheritance east of the Jordan by Moses, and Joshua now oversaw the allotments for the rest.

What if your land and residence was allocated in this manner? Many of us would revolt at this idea. We’d think it unfair. We would bristle at the idea that we couldn’t choose our own house, property, living location, or neighbors. We believe we are entitled to set our own living arrangements.

While that is mostly true, it is actually no more true for us than the people in Joshua’s day. The places allocated for the various tribes are the places where their children were born. So, too, the places where our parents lived are where we each were born. Even if someone is born in a place far from home, there is a home to which they return.

All this reminds us that God’s providence shapes our lives in ways we don’t always choose—much like the tribes of Israel received their inheritance by divine appointment. Paul will use this reality to give witness to Jesus’ resurrection to the philosophers on Mars Hill when he reaches Athens. We can trust the Holy Spirit to work through our unique places and roles to grow his Kingdom. We can embrace our God-given contexts, knowing that in every location and vocation, His grace equips us to live out His purpose with faith and love.

Mark’s introduction here in Acts 13 is brief and somewhat clouded since his appearance here mentions only that he was along to help Paul and Barnabas, but that he soon left them and returned to Jerusalem.

Perhaps he was simply afraid. He had seen some mighty acts of God through Paul. The magician at Paphos confronted by Paul. He saw the magician blinded as a punishment for trying to turn the procouncil away from the faith. Mark may not have been ready for a journey as long and arduous as lay before this missionary band. Perhaps he just felt the need to return to Jerusalem.

In any case, Mark appears for only a brief few verses here. You might think that he is a footnote in the story of God and his mission. A fuller look at the accounts in Acts as well as other passages of Scripture tells us a different story. He may not be a take-the-hill missionary like Paul. But he has his place, and offers us a look into the work of God in the hearts of people.

It is quite likely that the the rich young ruler in the Gospel of Mark 10:17-22 and the young man who ran away naked at Jesus’ arrest (Mark 14:51-52) is one and the same – and the author of the Gospel of Mark. It is also very likely that this is the same person as is called John (Mark) who is introduced here in Acts 13. John is introduced as “John whose other name was Mark,” in Acts 12:12. This young man gets around!

This makes me think of how God works in people’s lives. We may not be a dramatic example of God’s redemption and renewal. But we might be more of that than we know.

I have to admit that I was dramatically changed by God in my early college years. I was changed from a failed real estate broker and college dropout to a motivated student and seminary graduate. Some who knew me then might wonder if it’s all true. Others don’t really know how far I’ve come – or better yet, how far God has brought me.

Mark will show up again later in Acts. We will see how two people – both faithful followers of Jesus – can have different opinions about his part in God’s mission. But the constant in all this is God’s faithfulness, and his desire to work in people’s lives – rich young rulers and frightened young men alike.

I have most of Psalm 51 functionally memorized. I get tripped up here and there, but I don’t get tripped up on the essence of the Psalm. This is a psalm of repentance, asking God for forgiveness, and a pure heart. These two things are something only God can do. He alone creates – or better yet – re-creates clean hearts. He alone forgives sin. Those two works of God are two facets of God’s gracious work in the lives of believers.

Some might say that true believers never sin. But the sinful flesh continues to cling to us until the day we die – even after we’ve been brought to faith. And though we may repent daily (as we should) we still sin much and never outgrow the need for God’s grace, forgiveness and renewing work. John says it well: “If we say we are without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8). He also says, “But if we confess our sins, God, who is faithful and just will forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

Of this, David is a great example. This man after God’s own heart also let his heart be lured to lust after Bathsheba. He sinned with her and had to be confronted by Nathan the prophet for that sin. This psalm is his prayer of repentance. And it captures the hearts of many people, and has done so for many centuries. The portion of Psalm 51 that is used as the offertory in the liturgy of the church reaches deeply into the sinner’s heart. The good news of God’s forgiveness lifts the weight of sin and shame, and re-creates our hearts into the image of God’s love and grace, faithfulness and truth.

Today I thought of the follow-up to the most familiar part of Psalm 51 for many people, “And uphold me with a willing Spirit.” David continues, “Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will return to you.” The greatest impact we can have in the lives of wayward and erring people is a humble, repentant, and restored heart – rejoicing in God’s salvation.

Imagine it: In your next conversation with a doubting friend or weary family member, what if your quiet “I’ve been there, and here’s the mercy that met me” draws them home? Pray Psalm 51 in sincerity today; let it re-create you for such moments. After all, God’s grace isn’t to be hoarded. It is meant to be shared in the ordinary rhythm of our daily lives.

“Isaac loved Esau because he ate of his game, but Rebekah loved Jacob” (Genesis 25:28). The favoritism of these parents caused significant trouble for their children. The brothers fought and deceived each other, with Jacob tricking Esau out of his blessing, leading to years of estrangement. They reconciled after many years, but their relationship remained complex, suggesting lingering tension. Playing favorites causes great trouble.

Can you imagine if God played favorites as is supposed by some? I think of those who tie God’s favor to a certain political bent, or religious expression (not faith)? Actually I think that is exactly what is playing out in many Muslim countries. There is a clear sense of God’s favor attached to the true followers of Islam. The Qur’an describes Muslims as a favored community due to their adherence to Islam. This favor is conditional on righteousness.

Contrast that with God’s love and grace for all through Jesus. God loved the world (before the redemption of Jesus) and gave his Son that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. Jesus commands us to make disciples of all nations – not just a favored group, culture, or nation. God’s impartiality extends to both blessings and judgment, emphasizing fairness across all humanity.

You don’t get a bye because you’re a Lutheran, Texan, pastor, or Sunday School teacher. You don’t get to the front of the line because you’re a disciple. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Jesus commands that his followers put themselves at the end of the line, and show no partiality to any group, nation, or culture. We are to do good to all people as a reflection of God’s goodness, grace, mercy, and love for all people.

I like to say, the ground is level at the foot of the cross. I’ll stand shoulder to shoulder with any penitent sinner and together we can rejoice that God does not play favorites.